Forever February

It's a new year. I've neglected my posting.

Which is unfortunate because so much has happened since November.
Too much.

I'm at Toni's. She drives me crazy.

My phone is dead-- As always.
My folks are coming to town tonight, and I am supposed to pick up Kristin's shiny new toy car to chaufer them in. I'm glad they're here. Maybe I'll be able to stay out of trouble.

A beautiful life was lost... My Sam. I feel him everywhere. He's guiding me. I'd say more, but I don't need to start crying in anyone's kitchen.

Anyhow-- Life's strange. I have a lot of things that I need to pile together to get mine on the road it belongs on, the one I left when she left.

It's been a year. I think I'm finally letting go. Sometimes I wish I knew who you were. But then I think that I'm glad that I don't, this way I'm protected.

Let Me Borrow That Shirt, Betch!

Great night.


You know....

Until I got pushed over by Sabrina.


And then Ashley bit my arm and drew blood.
I told her she was being silly.


She back-handed me across the face.
My eye is swollen.
I look dumb.


The shit-fuck-fuckity part is....

Mo insisted on being there for me.
Then bailed.
Then sent me a HORRIBLE message from Krystal's phone.
Lame. :(


Betch

I like this CD I made for you better than u..

I told you to leave well-enough alone.
You still aren't.

Lame.
Boo!

Your termination papers have been filed.

Excuse me, I think you have my stapler..?

Don't make plans to show just because you think I want you to show.
Don't say you're coming if you know you aren't going to show.

Don 't say you're coming and not show.
Don't allow me to feel crazy when I ask you why you didn't show.
Don't make me ask you why you didn't show.

Don't neglect to break your own plans that you're going to show by not showing.

Don't pretend you never made plans to show.

Do not use the word "maybe" when speaking to me.

Do not say you'll call if you're not going to call.

Or at least take some time to retract all of these things BEFORE not doing what you say you're going to do.

You will never know how insulted I feel.

I will only send enormous amounts of catastrophic energy in your direction.

Beware the bad energy.

I am a mountain. You will not pass.

And give me back my fucking pipe, bitch!

the yearning

a blog of my very own.
how appropriate.

my heart burns.
but my mind is eagerly working out the kinks that have knotted over the last ten years.
in some ways i'm still thirteen.
i'm ready to let go and move on.
this will help me tremendously.

thank you, baby jesus.